End the Blame and Shame Game

Apr 22, 2026

 

You Can Break the Cycle

Every so often I find myself looking back, trying to understand where my beliefs and behavior patterns come from, because I’m a product of my past and my people.

Awareness is a good thing, and what we do with it is even more important. This is your wake-up call to use the past to propel you forward, not to shame yourself.

You're stressed out. There is no room for rational thought because stress is really fear, and your brain has moved from thinking mode to 'fight or flight.' You're angry, maybe lashing out. In the end, it hasn't been one of your finer moments.

"Who was that person? Did I really do that?" you may ask yourself when it's all over. And that's where the blame and shame game begins, with you.

You really did the best you could at that moment.

It’s time to let go of the guilt that comes from intellectually knowing better and wishing you had responded differently.

Maybe you learned it from your own parents, who were doing the best they could, and they learned it from their parents. For better or worse, we do what we know how to do. It's a cycle that goes back many generations.

Blaming yourself (and your ancestors) can easily become an excuse for those unproductive attitudes and behaviors.

What's the solution? Get help and support from people who have been successful at what you want to accomplish. When you learn better, you do better.

You hold the power to break the cycle.

 

 

Stay connected with news and updates!

Join our mailing list to receive a free parenting guide, the "Threats to Boundaries" bundle, and the latest news and updates from our team.

We hate SPAM. We will never sell your information, for any reason.