I don't like my teen!

behavior communication connection empathy parenting teens Mar 12, 2024

 

A mom tearfully told me that she doesn't know how to feel loving with her 13-year old son any more. He's been so difficult that all she sees are his behaviors, the ones that frustrate and anger her, and make her feel hopeless.

‌Verbalizing this is beyond difficult. It's painful and guilt-inducing. Don't despair. There is something you can do it about it.

When I shared today's tip with her, a clear shift occurred. I could see hope and possibility on her face and in her body language. The next time we spoke she reported an easing of tensions and some beautiful moments with her son.

Toddlers, teens and young adults, tantrums, learning differences, addictions.

𝙒𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪’𝙧𝙚 𝙜𝙤𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙖 𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝 𝙥𝙖𝙩𝙘𝙝, 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙪𝙥 𝙛𝙤𝙘𝙪𝙨𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙤𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙗𝙚𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙤𝙧𝙨 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙙𝙧𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙣𝙪𝙩𝙨.

“What happened to that sweet child I used to know? I know you’re in there somewhere!” You begin to lose sight of the beautiful person hidden behind those frustrating and distressing behaviors.

𝙎𝙝𝙚’𝙨 𝙞𝙣 𝙩𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚 𝙨𝙤𝙢𝙚𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙧𝙚. 𝙃𝙤𝙬 𝙙𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙝𝙚𝙧 𝙖𝙜𝙖𝙞𝙣?

Close your eyes. Think back to a time before the craziness started. 𝙍𝙚𝙢𝙚𝙢𝙗𝙚𝙧 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙨𝙬𝙚𝙚𝙩 𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙙 𝙬𝙝𝙤 𝙥𝙪𝙩 𝙖 𝙨𝙢𝙞𝙡𝙚 𝙤𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙛𝙖𝙘𝙚. 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙙𝙞𝙙 𝙨𝙝𝙚 𝙙𝙤 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙢𝙚𝙡𝙩𝙚𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩?

Are you there now, feeling the pure joy of the moment? Good.

Now be on the lookout for 𝙖 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙝𝙚𝙣 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙙 𝙞𝙨 𝙘𝙖𝙡𝙢 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙖𝙥𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙖𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙗𝙡𝙚. 𝙋𝙪𝙡𝙡 𝙤𝙪𝙩 𝙩𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙨𝙤𝙛𝙩, 𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙢 𝙢𝙚𝙢𝙤𝙧𝙮 𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙨𝙝𝙖𝙧𝙚 𝙞𝙩.

Watch the person you love gradually begin to reappear. This is how you re-establish connection and relationship.

Whether you've reached your limit or are just having a bad day, 𝙡𝙤𝙤𝙠 𝙗𝙚𝙝𝙞𝙣𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙘𝙝𝙞𝙡𝙙'𝙨 𝙗𝙚𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙤𝙧𝙨. Small miracles can happen.

She is so much more than her behaviors. Help her see and remember, too.

 

Stay connected with news and updates!

Join our mailing list to receive a free communication guide (10 Things to Avoid Saying to Your Teen) and the latest news and updates from our team.
Don't worry, your information will not be shared.

We hate SPAM. We will never sell your information, for any reason.